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Your handy guide to knowing the difference between your A-Levels and a Girlfriend Experience. Since time immemorial, sex-workers have had to rely on slang and abbreviations to advertise what... OWO, DFK, RO – the NSFW slangs sex workers use to advertise their services explained.

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Since time immemorial, sex-workers have had to rely on slang and abbreviations to advertise what they offer. Well, our fuzzy laws don’t help. At the moment, it’s totally legal to be a sex-worker – the act of exchanging money for sex is perfectly fine – you just can’t ‘solicit’ in public. There’s no real definition of what that means so a collection of ciphers, codes and cryptographs worthy of The Da Vinci Code are what we’ve had to rely on to advertise what we offer. Many of these date back to when postcards were placed in newsagent windows and telephone boxes. Others have sprung up since the internet made sex-work easier, simpler and safer. So here is a beginner’s guide to some of my favourite slangs. Girlfriend Experience. It’s SEX! It’s… sex. It’s everything you’d do with your partner, your girlfriend, your boyfriend, whatever. It’s the basics, it’s hugging, kissing, licking, blow jobs, hand jobs, oral, penetration. I can’t really put it more simply than that. Although when I first started, and hadn’t managed to research these things, I had just come out of a relationship where the ‘Girlfriend Experience’ meant picking up his pants and complaining about his mother. Porn Star Experience. Same as the Girlfriend Experience, only louder and more expensive. We pull more exaggerated faces and say, ‘Oh yeah, oh god yeah!’ a lot more, because porn has taught you that’s how sex should be done, right? Frankly, if you’re the kind of idiot who thinks a penis in a vagina can be anymore magical than it already is, then you deserve to lose the extra money. Deep French Kissing. That’s correct, snogging is not automatically included in the Girlfriend Experience. I would always say it was discretionary, as I’ll have no truck with green teeth or halitosis. Turning up at the door with a cold sore on your lip means a one-way ticket to the blacklist. Oral WithOut – basically oral without protection. It’s fairly common because no-one likes the taste of latex. Reverse oral – going down on your service provider. One of my favourites! For all you naysayers out there, a lot of people think that sex workers are all about giving. More: Lifestyle. How to tell someone they're a bad kisser. Can you actually turn anxiety into excitement? How to stop breakouts when using suncream. Not so – I’m definitely about taking. It surprises some people to find that we also get sexually satisfied. I would say it’s only polite. A-Levels. There’s no way to put this in a more polite way – it just means ‘anal’. Yes, it needs to be specified whether it’s offered or not – and far too many civilians don’t realise that sex workers come with their own ‘don’t’ list. A-levels was right at the top of mine. Exit only.
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